Pam Sherman

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We are not OK.

September 14, 2020

The day after news outlets shared the video of the incident surrounding the death of Daniel Prude this past March, I knew that my city was next. 

I knew that the myth that this was a city that was somehow responding to the Black Lives Matter movement better than others was about to be gutted. And I knew that the streets that had been quiet for a few weeks would erupt — again.

Then, the day after a peaceful protest devolved into turmoil, making international news, the concerned texts and phone calls started rolling in from friends all over the world.

“Are you OK?”

I received them while I was sitting in front of my house on a beautiful Saturday morning. The air was crisp and clean, and the only sounds I heard were birds and some traffic.

And I thought, of course, I’m OK. Why are you asking me? I’m a white woman living in America in 2020. I have the unearned luxury of being OK.  And to be very clear, I’m not OK with that.

So, I want everyone who reads this and those who checked in to know that while I appreciate their concern, they need to know this truth: We are not OK.

Wherever you live, in the city, in the suburbs or around the globe far away from here, we are definitely not OK.  Whoever you are — whatever gender, age, or religion — we are absolutely not OK.

We are not OK because we all live in a world where a man named Daniel Prude could have a hood put over his head and die, rather than having a blanket put over his shivering body and be treated with kindness.

We are not OK because police officers, who I am certain believe they are following their duty and trying their best to keep the peace, are instead taught “protocols” that leave little room for humanity and instead create division.  

We are not OK because a family in mourning had to wait for five months before anyone paid attention to what they tirelessly sought after the death of their loved one: explanations and justice.

We are not OK because peaceful protests in response to this travesty escalated to conflict, rather than making room to allow people to safely express their anger, hurt and frustration.

And most important, we are not OK because public officials deflected responsibility rather than doing what is expected of them: leading with transparency and humility.

I am in awe of those who are tirelessly on the front lines holding those officials and our system accountable. Here in Rochester, young leaders like Adrian Hale, Danielle Ponder, Ashley Gantt and Stanley Martin are making sure that their voices are heard around the world. 

I know that my words are not enough. But words are what I have to provide from my own perspective as a former lawyer, former suburbanite, and current resident of a city, country and world that needs to change.

To all those who called to check in on us, know this: Your city is the next Minneapolis, Louisville or Rochester. Because until systemic change actually happens, those who are not OK with how our world is must continue to fight for what it should be.

Until that happens, none of us will be OK.


First Published in the Democrat and Chronicle and USA Today Network.

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